"I am the Vine; you are the branches. Whoever lives in Me and I in him bears much (abundant) fruit. However, apart from Me [cut off from vital union with Me] you can do nothing." - John 15:5
1. How can a rebellious child of God come to rely on deceit?
There are many different circumstances that may lead to relying on deceit, but I think the steps look something like this:
believing a lie, because it looks like an easy answer to your problem
believing in additional lies to support the original lie
removing all truth from your life, so that believing that lie(s) is easy
surrounding yourself with others who embrace the same lie(s) as you
relying on a lie, to make your decisions and life choices look right and good.
2. Why do rebellious children of God run from real answers?
When we are in the midst of rebelling against God, the last thing we want is to hear the very truth, that proves everything we are doing is wrong. Our pride cannot handle that type of blow. Many times it takes the worst of circumstances to make us realize our mistake and finally turn back to God, because we finally realize He is the only one who can fix the mess we've made.
3. Which do you find more difficult, returning to God or resting in Him?
In my life I find the resting in Him, and trusting Him to take care of everything the hardest. I am pretty quick to admit when I've made a mistake, but resting in Him and letting Him fix it is tough for me; I want to step in and try to fix things my own way.
4. Which of the characteristics of rebellion have been your tendencies?
Number 4. A rebellious child of God relies on oppression.
1. Why is obedience so necessary to freedom in Christ?
I like to picture a door, that has a really old lock, you know the kind that takes one of those skeleton key's, but this lock and key are unlike any other, and there is only one key that will unlock the door. Behind this door is God's blessing, and freedom from all of the things that bind us, peace that goes beyond anything we can understand, and much more...Obedience is the key! When we obey God's commands, it unlocks everything God wants to give us, and everything we could never deserve on our own. Freedom!!
2. How have you experienced gaining freedom in one area only to have bondage appear in another area of your life?
Somewhere between the ages of five and ten, I developed a fear of bugs. Not just a "eww, get that away from me!" fear, but a "Oh, bee!!" jump out of the fishing boat into freezing cold water when you can't swim, type of fear. Once when I was putting on my shoe, the way the laces moved made me think there was a spider on the shoe, and my first reaction was to fling the shoe as far from me as possible. It went up in the air, across the room and hit the wall just inches from my husbands head. I think he thought I'd gone crazy! The same year as this incident, I was a part of a ladies bible study at our church, and the study covered faith, and fear. I felt God telling me that the fear was not from Him and that He wanted to take it from me. I told the ladies, and they all gathered around me to pray for me. The next day, there was a bug on the wall and I just walked over and killed it with out thinking about what I did. My husbands jaw just about hit the floor, and the look on his face told me something was off, but I couldn't figure out what, then he said, "You just killed that bug!" and it was like a light-bulb went off in my head as I realized that the fear was gone. But soon I found that the fear of bugs was replaced by a new type of fear, and I had to pray and ask God for deliverance once again.
3. How are we today like the rebellious Israelites in Isaiah 30?
The Israelites didn't act like they were children of God, and the same is true for many Christians today. The Israelites didn't listen to God's instructions, hmm I think that sounds like us too. Also, the Israelites preferred pleasant words, rather than the truth that might hurt...this one is so true of us today. The Israelites relied on oppression, today we may not even realize that we are oppressed and yet without the oppression we would not know what to do. The Isrealites learned to depend on deceit while running from the real answers God provided, today we take the lies of the enemy and depend on them, while we turn our backs on God's Word and the answers He has for all of the problems in our lives. We really are not much different that the Israelites, we make the same mistakes, they made, everyday.
4. Which of the characteristics of a rebellious child of God have you experienced?
I think in my life I have experienced the not listening to God's instructions more than any of the others. But I am sure at one point or another, I have experienced all of these to a degree.
1. Why do some people refuse to give up on their dreams while others do?
Some people give up on their dreams because they truly believe that those dreams are impossible and will never happen. When you don't see any hope that your dreams will come true, it is easy to just say forget about it, and make new dreams. However, if you know that your dreams are not all that far out of reach, it would take a lot to make you give up on them.
2. How has God brought happiness from pain in your life?
I once questioned God's reasons for a change in my life and the pain it brought, but that very change brought about some great quality time with the Lord, and one of those rare friends that are there for life, no matter what.
3. Why do you suppose we discount the importance of happiness in spiritual circles?
People tend to get their focus off of the important things, and many times people start looking for happiness, instead of just enjoying it when it comes along. They forget to be content with the joy and blessings that come from being in God's will. So they loose sight of following after God, and they follow after all of the things that, they think, will bring them happiness. This has happened so many times that spiritual leaders eventually stopped using the word happy, and now mainly use words like joy, blessed, contentment, etc. because those words are not things you can get from the world, and it is easier to keep people on track if they are not distractedly looking for happiness.
1. How does it feel to want something desperately and not be permitted to have it?
Horrible! To desire something with your whole heart and to not ever be able to have it, is comparable to having something and having it taken away prematurely; only in this situation they don't even have the joy of ever having it, even for a short time.
2. Why do your suppose people often relate barrenness to sinfulness?
I think many people buy into the lie, that God is just waiting for us to mess up, so that He can bring His punishment down on us, like a strike of lightening or something. So when they hear the news from the doctor that for one reason or another they will not be able to have children, they immediately assume that God is punishing them for past mistakes, or sin.
A quick word for those who are dealing with this heart wrenching news...God Loves you and He has great plans for you. God is not sitting on His high throne just waiting for an opportunity to crack his whip! He is walking with you, He is loving you and making sure that you get what is best for you now and in the future. God sees the big picture and someday, you will look back and say, "Oh Lord, I had no idea that you were going to bring this about in my life...this is far greater than I could have ever imagined." You are a child of God, and all you have to do is trust Him and walk close to Him, follow His leading and expect Him to do great things in you and through you!
3. How can you invest yourself in rearing spiritual children?
"Do you not say, ‘There are still four months and then comes the harvest’? Behold, I say to you, lift up your eyes and look at the fields, for they are already white for harvest!" (John 4:35)
I don't own a farm, nor have I ever spent much time on a farm...but I know what it means for the fields to be white for harvest. All we have to do is open our eyes and look. God is preparing hearts and opening doors, we just have to be obedient. When He leads us to reach out...whether in a big way or a small way, we must be obedient and follow God's leading. It is then that we will reap the harvest (aka: rear spiritual children).
1. Why do you think people are so insecure about their appearance?
Maybe it is because our focus is in the wrong place, are we focusing on what others think, instead of what God thinks? This is one area that God is working on in my life...and someday, I believe, I will see myself as He sees me.
2. How does the love reflected in the Song of Songs compare to your relationship to Christ?
The love expressed in the Song of Songs is exactly how Christ feels about all of us. So all of us have that kind of a love relationship with Christ...whether we return that type of love to Christ or not.
3. How do you feel about the love Christ Displays for you?
Unworthy, but extremely grateful! He loves me more than I could ever deserve, and He is not ashamed to show it. I can only sit and soak it in, thankful that He loves me.
4. How is the childhood dream to be beautiful fulfilled in Christ?
When Jesus died on the cross and took on the sins of the world, He made a way for us to be cleansed of our old filthy rags (sin) and be transformed into beauty beyond our wildest imagination.
1. How do you respond to the "fairy tale" ending to the story of Tamar?
I am a complete romantic...and that sounds like the perfect ending. No more ashes, or torn clothes, but beauty, a crown with jewels, and a new gown of fine linen...beauty for ashes!
2. How does the term bride differ from the term wife?
When I hear the term bride I think of a new beginning, a new life starting out together, a young love that will mature and get better with time, brides are beautiful, sparkling with joy and shining with love...The term wife brings to mind a more mature love, I see a wife as older, wiser, having dealt with more pain, sorrow, and the realities of life. There is joy and love in the term wife, but it is not as fresh and new as the term bride.
3. What does it mean to you to be the bride of Christ?
I think God not only describes us as brides to show the type of relationship we will have with Him in heaven, but also to teach us how He sees us today. When we get to heaven, all of us as one, will make up the Bride of Christ, and so we will have a fresh and new love, and a joy unspeakable. I think it also, may mean we will be youthful and vibrant, we will not be brides for a while and then become a wife...we will remain the bride, which means we will continue in that first love, and beauty for all eternity.
4. How can we make ourselves ready for the Bridegroom?
By making sure we know as much as we can about the Bridegroom, spending time each day getting to know Him and becoming His friend, and letting Him become your friend. I would imagine that we should also consciously work to have all of the fruits of the spirit in our lives, and that we should walk away from the sin in our lives and move into living a life that will please Him.
1. How do people in your culture give expression to their grief?
In our culture today, it seems that many people think it's better not to express grief, they hold it in and try to deny it. Those that do show their grief, do it in many ways...weeping, moaning, being quiet and withdrawn, or some even become angry...I don't know of any physical sign of grief (like ripping your clothes and putting ashes on your head) being very common in America.
2. In what ways does modern society victimize women?
I think that the way women are portrayed in the movies, on TV, and in magazines, makes all women feel like they can never good enough...seems how the normal woman is not a size zero, with no imperfections. So not only do women feel like they don't match up, but men may expect women to meet a certain image, instead of looking at the beauty on the inside, everything is based on outer beauty.
3. How did you first come to realize that you are a virgin daughter or son of the King?
I went to a women's retreat as a young adult, and the theme that weekend was about being a daughter of the King and what that means for all of us in the family of God. That weekend, I realized how God saw me; no matter how I saw myself, or how anyone else saw me; God saw me as His beautiful, spotlessly pure, daughter, a princess, royalty at it's finest. And what God sees is really all that matters.
How to describe grief...grief is painful, overwhelming, heart wrenching, uncontrollable, and it takes a long time to recover. I find that even when I think I've grown beyond the grief of a loss; just a small word or thought can be a trigger, bringing back the feeling of loss all over again, as if it just happened yesterday.
2. What is the purpose of grieving?
"Every time we suffer loss, we encounter an opportunity for the loss to bring gain for Jesus' sake by allowing His life to be revealed in us." -Beth Moore Pg. 133
3. Why did Jesus delay His coming to heal Lazarus?
For God's glory! When Jesus raised Lazarus from the dead, the bible says that many of the Jews gathered there, put their faith in Jesus.
4. How can those in Christ experience a satisfying life again after loss?
Grief is natural after experiencing a loss, but if we let Jesus come in and heal our wounded heart He will restore us to a more abundant life. We cannot do it on our own it is only through the power of Christ that we can be made whole again.
1. When our hearts have been broken, what are some destructive ways we are tempted to react?
I think it depends on the person, here are just a few I can think of off the top of my head...some people try to lash out in anger or try to get revenge, where someone else might try to cover their hurt with drugs or alcohol, others may close themselves off from everyone and deal with depression and thoughts of suicide, but no matter who we are or what we are tempted to do, to deal with our pain...Jesus is the only real answer!
2. Why are people sometimes intimidated by the depth of our need? Why is Christ never intimidated by our need?
People are just that; People! We are limited in what we can handle and how much we can take on...somethings are just to great for us to handle on our own. I also believe that many times we are intimidated by situations that hit too close to home with an issue in our own lives. If we have hurt and pain in our own lives that we have not dealt with, there is no way we can help anyone else who is going through a similar situation.
Jesus on the other hand, not only can handle way more than anything we could give Him, but He has walked this earth and dealt with the same types of things. Not only that but He has also made it possible for us to be victorious through them.
3. How do you suppose Jesus felt over the betrayal by Judas?
I can only imagine that that type of betrayal would hurt beyond words. To have someone you love and trust, trade your life for 30 pieces of silver; I cannot even begin to imagine.
4. Why did Christ consider only Judas's actions betrayal?
Judas did not just do something selfish without thinking of what it would mean for Jesus, He planned it out in advance knowing full and well that it would cost Jesus His life, and went ahead and did it anyway.
The other disciples may have fallen away...but it was out of fear for their own lives...it was in response to the situation, not preplanned without a care or concern for those it may effect.
5. What is the difference between betrayal motivated by selfishness and betrayal motivated by evil?
I would say Judas acted out of evil, where as the other disciples acted out of selfishness. Betrayal motivated by evil is just that evil, without any concern for those it effects, it wants to bring havoc down on all those involved. Where as betrayal motivated by selfishness, does not necessarily want others to be hurt, but out of self-preservation, acts in a manner that may hurt others.
1. Why might those who have fallen victim to abuse be more likely to find progressive rather than instantaneous healing?
Because there is not an easy button in life...things take time, and when it is as deep of a hurt, as that caused by abuse, it is only by the divine power of Christ and the truth of God's Word that can set one free and make them whole. God does not promise us that things will be easy or fast, just that He will finish what He has started and so we just have to be faithful and keep trusting in Him because...
"The LORD is trustworthy in all he promises and faithful in all he does.
The LORD upholds all who fall and lifts up all who are bowed down.
The eyes of all look to you, and you give them their food at the proper time.
You open your hand and satisfy the desires of every living thing.
The LORD is righteous in all his ways and faithful in all he does.
The LORD is near to all who call on him, to all who call on him in truth.
He fulfills the desires of those who fear him; he hears their cry and saves them.
The LORD watches over all who love him, but all the wicked he will destroy."
Psalms 145:13b-20
2. What is Christ's attitude toward children? Toward abuse of children?
Jesus loves Children, in fact, He told the adults that they had to become like a child in order to enter the kingdom of heaven...Children have an innocence and they completely trust, believe, and love without holding back.
God is love, and love would never want something to harm a small innocent child or any person of any age...so I would say that Jesus has some pretty strong feelings and attitudes towards abuse.
3. Why might Matthew 18:6-10 refer to childhood victimization?
Because of the wording (see below, the yellow text marks the key words that may suggest that Jesus was referring to childhood victimization):
6 “Whoever causesone of theselittle ones who believe in Meto sin, it would be better for him if a millstone were hung around his neck, and he were drowned in the depth of the sea. 7 Woe to the world because of offenses!For offenses must come, but woe to that man by whom the offense comes! 8 “If your hand or foot causes you to sin, cut it off and cast it from you. It is better for you to enter into life lame or maimed, rather than having two hands or two feet, to be cast into the everlasting fire. 9 And if your eye causes you to sin, pluck it out and cast it from you. It is better for you to enter into life with one eye, rather than having two eyes, to be cast into hell fire. 10 “Take heed that you do not despiseone of these little ones, for I say to you that in heaven their angels always see the face of My Father who is in heaven.
4. How do you feel about forgiving those who offended or hurt you?
I know that it can be hard to forgive someone who has hurt you deeply. And I know that for some it may seem like forgiving lets the offender off of the hook. But the truth is, that holding on to un-forgiveness only hurts you. The offender has no clue that you are still holding on to those horrible feelings, and it effects their life very little. You see their punishment will come...God is a fair and righteous judge and we must leave revenge in His hands, He will take care of it. When we hold on to un-forgiveness, we help Satan hold us captive...we must forgive in order to be free and it allows God to start the healing process, and then He can bring restoration and rebuild those ruins to reveal their magnificent beauty!
As Beth says on pg 116 "Anything that directly causes a child to have an increase tendency toward sin can be characterized as victimization or abuse." So if we reverse that sentence - Any type of victimization or abuse can cause a child to have an increased tendency toward sin.
2. How does abuse of a child both prove heart breaking and promote sin?
When a child is abused, they lose something...emotionally, physically, mentally...they see themselves differently and they accept the lie that they are not as good as everyone else. When children see themselves as lower or less important than others, or not worth much...they are more apt to try to get attention and love from places and people who will only cause them more harm. Abuse breaks the heart and opens the door to sin in many ways.
3. How does Christ's love for children cause Him to relate to the problem of child abuse?
In Matthew 18:5 Jesus said this "Whoever welcomes a little child like this in My name welcomes Me", so then, what we do for the children, or to the children, we also do for or to Jesus. Can you imagine the pain Jesus feels each time a child is abused? I am sure that Jesus feels the pain of it just as much as the child does, and He is longing for the child to come to Him so that he can take that pain and hurt away and bring about something good in their life.
4. How can Christ use the pain of a turbulent childhood for our good?
Jesus can take the pain and hurt of any situation and work it out for good. The situation may not be good, but the results can be. For example, as a child I had a terrible speech impediment and most people could not understand a word I said...I remember so many times adults turning to my mom for an interpretation, and many times she had to ask me several questions in order to figure out what I was trying to say. I grew up with peers and teachers who would purposefully try to get me to say things that they could make fun of...it was humiliating. But God has helped me to over come the speech problems and has caused me to be more compassionate and understanding of people who have physical disabilities. I am a better person today, because of the trials I went through with this disability!
5. How do you feel about the way Christ relates to the problem of child abuse?
I am so thankful that I can say that my God loves people, young or old, big or small, broken and hurting or healthy and happy. And God wants to bring about good in all of our lives. So the idea that Christ relates to the problem of child abuse and wants to see them healed and made whole, really is not a shock to me...I have come to realize that anything less would just not be acceptable... God is love and love is what He is all about!
A broken heart is this horrible ache, deep in your chest, it is more emotional than physical, and yet it is a very physical pain. When a heart gets broken it feels as if it will never return to a normal state, and that the pain may go on forever. A broken heart may make one feel hopeless, helpless, and horribly depressed.
2. How do you respond to the knowledge that God gave His Son specifically for your broken heart?
I cannot help but feel undeserving of such a loving sacrifice. I look at me - a broken, fallen, sinner, and then I look at Jesus - the perfect Son; the comparison shows that God loves me more than I can comprehend, for reasons beyond what my mind can grasp...I find myself in awe that God loves me so much!
3. In what ways do people become self-protective in response to a broken heart?
I like the picture Beth painted in a previous study - Loving Well- A picture of a heart broken and bruised, and instead of letting God heal it, we wrap it in duct tape, and when it still hurts we just keep adding layer after another layer. In a short amount of time, we have it so covered in duct tape, you cannot tell it is a heart, and no love is allowed in and no love comes out. In other words, we stop allowing people to get close and we think that if we don't love again, we won't be hurt again...we stop really living emotionally!
4. What is different about Christ's way of healing a broken heart as apposed to the natural human response to protect self?
God's love and peace can heal our broken heart and use that hurt to bring about something good in our life and possibly the lives of others. If we allow Him to come in and work on us, He can and will heal our brokenness and restore us to a point of living more than we did before!
